For those of you who don’t know, I am just one of the many people affected by “twerking” and I’d like to say a few words in memoriam. We are gathered here today, to mourn and honor the end of the dance craze “twerking.” Urban Dictionary defines twerking as “the act of moving/ shaking ones bottom in a circular, up-and-down, and side-to-side motion–or just tweeting at work.” It’s been months since it’s worldwide debut at the 2013 VMAs. Every day since then, it’s been a non-stop twerk off between people on both our computer and television screens. There were good times, and very bad times. I remember the first time I tried to twerk, and then the wave of shame and embarrassment that came afterward. Let us not forgot the many variations of this expressive art form, such as wall-twerking, which almost always ended in someone falling on their face. In all truth, it didn’t matter who you were, what you look like, or where you came from, twerking was something everyone (thought they) could do. I find pride in knowing I can share the memories of what it was like to live in the twerking era with my future children, and even their children too. Twerking was fun for awhile, but we must accept the fact that nothing lasts forever.
Let us take a moment to remember the girls who twerked their way to fame, fortune, or the nearest emergency room. I’ll always be able to look back on my college years and remember how they were filled with this revolutionary movement, and there are many people to thank for that. Miley Cyrus, thank you for showing us that not everyone should twerk, because no one does it quite as well as you. I’d like to give my condolences to Robin Thick as it is a shame his wife and him couldn’t twerk it out in the end. My gratitude to Jimmy Kimmel, for fooling us all with that Youtube video of that girl who’s yoga pants caught on fire while twerking, for reminding us that dancing comes with a price (Those yoga pants are expensive). Life is short, and there is no guarantee you will twerk forever. Not only is this the end of a dance style, but an end of an era as well. We will never forget the memories, or the many vine videos of people trying to twerk. Those 6 second moments will live on forever. I’ll be the first to admit, twerking and I didn’t always see eye to eye (or ass to ass, I guess) but I think it’s time to bury the ratchet. Let me end with a beautiful quote from a song called Twerk It: “I ain’t never seen it twerk like that, So when she turn around and work it, Back it up and dump it, Ask her who she twerkin’ for like that” I think it’s time to lay twerking to rest. Goodbye twerking, in our regrets you’ll always stay, haunted and remembered every day. RIP Twerking.